behind the trigger

offtide:

twitter sketches that got increasingly elaborate pt. 2

100% proven zodiac analyses

  • aries: short-tempered kind-hearted babies
  • taurus: stubborn knucklehead cuties who are nice to everyone
  • gemini: intelligent blabber-mouths w a great sense of humor
  • cancer: over-emotional compassionate lil cupcakes
  • leo: melodramatic fun-loving fucks
  • virgo: creative whiny pissbabies who are intellectually stimulating
  • libra: ditsy carefree pacifist qts
  • scorpio: intensely emotional secretive bad bitches
  • sagittarius: honest philosophical travel-agents who don't give a fuck
  • capricorn: organized self-driven sarcastic dickheads
  • aquarius: extroverted detached open-minded freaks
  • pisces: sensitive lazyasses who are ideological + creatively stimulating

hotdad-erwinsmith:

fellas to my left…honeys on my right…folks who don’t fit into the gender binary levitate above me in cool poses…

[excited humming noises]

sammy gets back today

They call themselves the Guardians of the Galaxy. What a bunch of a-holes.

neferipitou:

adds “we just caught our alternate universe selves making out and now everything is super awkward” to list of shipping tropes that need to be implemented everywhere

fannyann:

i would follow you to the ends of the earth with only mild complaining 

premiium:

rapewhistled:

still havent seen any greenday jokes….its september….wtf is going on

i guess everyone’s on holiday


"His mind is everywhere."

"His mind is everywhere."

unrealisticdepictionsofme:

bubblepoopswamp:

Okay everyone. Do you see this?
Do you see these two words?
They do not mean the same thing.
Can we all decide to stop using “gay” as a synonym for bisexual, since they’re completely different things? Bisexuality is not the same concept as homosexuality, nor is it a subset of it.

That aside I’m all for bi Spiderman

unrealisticdepictionsofme:

bubblepoopswamp:

Okay everyone. Do you see this?

Do you see these two words?

They do not mean the same thing.

Can we all decide to stop using “gay” as a synonym for bisexual, since they’re completely different things? Bisexuality is not the same concept as homosexuality, nor is it a subset of it.

That aside I’m all for bi Spiderman

legfruit:

there’s always those neighbour countries that sort of hate each other like new zealand and australia, britain and france, the rest of the world and america

Head of Medusa - Rubens

lieutenantstilinski:

edenidoigo:

whalegod:

tell me a secret

One time during class my drama/english teacher, who’s a devout vegan and all about not killing animals, accidentally stepped on a ladybug. He froze up and slowly cradles it in his hand and he was so heartbroken and started quoting Hamlet.

I didn’t have the heart to tell him that it was a red m&m.

I can’t breathe